It Reeks of Piss and 409

I spent pretty much all of yesterday at the University Medical Center (UMC – a student hospital) trying to figure out why I had a seizure and fainted on Wednesday afternoon.  After filling out paper work then sitting & waiting (four hours) the doctors and nurses finally got started on me.  After some blood and urine were expounded, and CAT scans and X-Ray machines were warmed up, I was tested.  I had a terrible experience with almost every member of the staff.  After all of the time (and money) spent a doctor came into my room, put a stethoscope on me for two seconds and said “While I’m not saying what happened was caused by nothing, I am saying we can’t pinpoint what caused the seizures and fainting.”

There were other problems I had with the people in the hospital – like the EKG technician that just ripped open my hospital gown and started slapping cold EKG sticky thingies on me.  It went down like this:

• Sound of my room curtain sliding open
• A girl with an EKG machine rolls in
• Girl rips open my hospital gown
• Starts slapping EKG sticky tabs on me
• Slap
• Slap
• Tittie
• Slap

P.S. She was all about just putting stuff on my body without explaining it or introducing herself before she saw my goodies.  Oh, and those little sticky pads were cold.com.

After the EKG she said I should stay unrobed and the doctor would come back to tell me about my results (since they did the EKG after he said all tests cleared – good order, right?).  I then sat in the room long enough to doze off, take photos and eavesdrop on an entire conversation the police were having with the patient in the bed next to me.

Enjoy the photos.

Rain Streaked Windows

It’s raining outside.  It’s 6:02am.  I’m awake.

Working a graveyard shift (10pm-6am) sucks on my days off (especially when my work gives me a four day weekend) because all I want to do is go out and have fun with my friends.  Unfortunately, that requires me being awake during normal daylight hours, and sleeping like normal people during the night.  I do this, hang out and have fun – and then today (Wednesday) rolls around.  Now I’m awake at 5am, I’ll be up during the day, then I’ll have to report in to work tonight for 8 long and boring hours.  Wednesdays are br00tal.

In other news, I saw “Twilight”.  The movie only affirmed thoughts I was already having.  I am pretty sure I am a vampire, save drinking human blood.  I see so much of myself in the main (vampire) character, Edward.  We are both extremely moody and overly-intense.  I am up all night.  I never go out in sunlight anymore.  I drive like a speed freak.  I feel very protective of the ones I love and I’m incredibly good-looking and impossible to resist.  Okay, so the last two were a little in jest.

So if I’m Edward, where’s my Bella, damnit!?!

Why Are You a Depot?

Dear Home Depot,

Why are you a depot if you don’t have what I’m looking for?  I just spent two hours of my day driving to different Home Depots looking for a special light bulb.  One your associates told me you had it, but then magically you didn’t have it.  Gas costs a lot of money, so you could really do people the favor of getting your crap together!

Now I’ve got to try and find a Lowe’s, or maybe if I’m really lucky, a Wal-Mart home deptartment that has one.

Sheesh.

(I’m having a moody day, obviously!).

Here’s a Tip About Tipping

Hi. My name is Kacey. I work at a casual dining restaurant. I don’t think I’ll give you the name – it’s a little too spicy. Anyway – I work in To-Go. This means if you call in to-go, you get me. I take your orders and walk you through all the steps just like a server. I take your order attentively as well as politely. I treat your order with care because it matters to me and I’m proud of what I do. From the moment your food is ordered to the time you eat it – I’m involved in the making of it.  I make sure I get your order 100% correct by reading it back to you. I offer you options you may not have known you had. I’m your friggin’ walking, talking menu. I then place your order as fast as I get it so it can be ready in the accurate (and short) wait time I give you. I make sure the cooks get your order right by personally inspecting every single order to make sure it is 100% correct. I check your vegetables to see whether or not you got the butter phase. Then I box it. …and when I say I box it I mean I make that shiz look freakin’ great…because when you think about it, this is just semi fast food. Then I get it to you – meanwhile I’ve entertained and hosted by offering complementary drinks and seating. When you get your food it’s warm. it’s fresh, it’s correct and it’s worth every cent. I go well above and beyond the standards set for me or for servers. Think about this…

Today I worked a 6 hour shift.
…I made 3 dollars in tips.

Everybody’s excuse is, “You aren’t a server so it’s different. You don’t really wait on people.”

It didn’t make itself, people.